Taking the Piss in the Piscina

Have I  ever liked teenage youths?  Answer in general NO, not even when I was a teenager, apart from the opposite sex, and only then if they had long blond hair, a shapely figure , did not smoke, and sounded alright when they opened their north and south.

So why should I like them here ???  Answer I don't.

Here they roam the streets after siesta from 6pm to 1am. They are adolescent hombres and hombres being the apt translation in the derogatory sense. They are noisy. They have places they could go to basketball , football pitches, instead they roam the streets. They don't mug people, they don't cause damage. They litter, they congregate, they piss me off, they get out of my way as I walk straight through them with 3 dogs.  Like Moses and the parting of the waves.

However I have observed that about 10 - 12 of them get into our swimming pool every afternoon, because one boy has an electronic fob and lets them in, the attendant does nothing.  Now I paid 330 euros for maintenance per annum, including the upkeep of the swimming pool (piscina) and the grounds, plus the privado (privacy) of the complex. But they jump out of 2 cars, wait for someone to open the gate, jump in and leave the gate open for more hombre invaders. Of course there is the security aspect of all this too, and  potential theft.

We have a Presidente of this complex, who shrugs his shoulders, that these hombres get in free ( gratis) while the residents PAY a lot of money.  In the end Martin and I and a few of his Spanish neighbours formed a possee and told this Presidente ("I am only voluntary")  and this Pool Attendant that this is unaccepatble. Caused so much stink the hombres vammoosed while we argued in the Pool area.

But a battle won is not the end of the war, so with Google Translate I am writing a translated letter to the town hall. See peace and relaxation did not last long. I have to say Martin, a teacher from London living now with a Geordie in Geordie land ( why ???) (he stays here every other month ), his command of Spanish  was impressive in the negotiations as the Spanish try to find every reason NOT to do anything. Like having spring loaded gates (they lock but sometimes left open !! grrrr)

I have said before  the Spanish have no desire whatsoever to be quiet at any hour of the day or night, when they are here in their droves as they are now that school is out, they are unbearable as a race. Horns beep, women and kids shout, engines run, women talk at speed of a Kalashnikov machine gun, radios blare. Weekends they are even worse, and the Kalashnikov would be very handy......................where's a Terminator when you want one !!!!

So, infiltration and befriending the Spanish is a big NO No  not only for me but for all the Saxon and Viking Invaders.  Bobby and his wife and 2 very small children had a drink in the garden last night with me. Bobby asked me for help and information a few weeks ago. I thought he was Spanish and I told him about the piss takes in the piscina. Turns out he and his wife are Persian !!!!!! Living in Sweden after the Islamic revolution in 1978 when his family were executed !!!!  His story of survival is incredible  and chilling. They are nice., the little girl also knows the invisible ball thrown into the empty paper bag trick now.............spread the gags worldwide !!!!. They don't like the Spanish either. So our survey said..................... err err, no one was found that liked the Spanish except the Spanish when they are not arguing with each other !!!!!!!!!. Carramba.

In fact one just walked by and I have sussed that they only time they don't talk is when they have a fag in their mouth, else it would drop to the floor according to Isaac Newton. So, one good reason why they should keep smoking:   silence,  the other good reason being Cancer of course and certain premature lingering death.

And so to take my mind off the indigenous population of this land I took some pretty fotos in the garden, in the sun, under the blue sky and the palm tree. Yes that is why you are here Allan.

Adios amigo, Hasta Pronto, unless you are Spanish of course (must be a nice one out there somewhere, I know, but have not found one yet, true, well keep looking, I will, don't need eyes though just ears !!!!) ( Maybe ear muffs  the sort  you take out of the fridge hahahhahahahaha  Oh Lay !!!

OH btw Fernando was ok in the Bhia Blanca, but then he wants your money so he has to  be nice.

Oh btw 2 : Spanish plants are beating the imported in a van English plants. Of course the gardening jury is still out till wait to next  year. But I have to sadly say a few, not many, a few English bulb plants have wiltered in this heat and decided to give the rest of the summer a miss RIP.. Otherwise everything in the garden is coming up Rosy, even the Roses, 1000 miles south .

Don't you just love the gags, its sun stroke of course, and they're coming to take him away he he ha ha to the funny farm, where life is beautiful all the time and they're coming to take him away he he ha ha........................... brush up on the basket weaving Sunday afternoons...Adios!!